From Generation to Generation

Transitioning from ‘adult’ to being a ‘parent’ is a journey of multi-dimensional growth. Branching out to bear good fruit requires deep rooting firm in the soil of righteousness. Parenting does not come with an instruction manual, it is what naturally passes on through the finite fabrication of humanity from one generation to the next.

I have come to realise that my every decision and action is somewhat influenced by the example of my parents and no matter what I teach my children, they will learn from my example. Therefore, in the intimidating face of atheism, materialism and luring technological advancement, we must consciously carry forward enriching traditions from our forefathers, that our children too may be model parents someday.

Doing Right by our Children and God

‘I thought about quitting, but then I noticed who was watching’, read a poster featuring a cub looking at her fierce yet tired Papa Lion. The present pressures of life lead us to feel like quitting: - our jobs, but we can’t (who will financially sustain us?), our relentless house-hold chores – (O but we must complete them). So, the easiest to quit, we find, is prayer (God will understand). It is here, that we fail primarily as parents, I dare say, almost daily. It has been truly observed that families that ‘pray together, stay together’. The ancestral Most Holy Rosary is a great tool to unite the family in prayer. Even a decade recited devotionally will aid strength for all things else. Growing in the knowledge and fear of God by our own example of reading the Bible daily, resorting to prayer in difficult moments and being deep-rooted in faith will go a long way in producing exemplary Christian youth and adults.

Rewarding our Children Daily

There is no ‘App’ that can substitute your ‘Lap’. The Bible tells us that children are an inheritance from the Lord. How then, must we treat them?

A great way our parents bonded with us was by the sharing of daily experiences. Dad’s assuring words of ‘your problems are our problems’ ensured my security in them always having my back. It is important to let our little ones know ‘everyday’, that we love them and care about what they do. Never let us miss the opportunity of telling them how precious they are in the sight of God and our own. No matter what the world tells them, they always care about what ‘we’ think of them, partly because they find their identity in us. Reading to them, making simple inexpensive games, involving them in family discussions, chores & jokes are daily rewards that can uplift their morale.

‘Sacrifice’ is the Key

In the age of time being equated with money, it is imperative that either one must be forfeited to invest duly in our children. We are often caught up earning to save for their future that we forgo investing in their present. Sometimes, as much as even putting our phones away just to spend quality time with our young ones seems like a daunting task – thus sending them the message that ‘things’ are more important than ‘people’. The biblical instruction (Prov: 22:6) ‘Train up a child in the way he should go’ behoves us to train ourselves first, so that our biggest fans – our children, may follow in credible footsteps.

God has promised unfailing love for a thousand generations of those who love Him and keep His commandments. Being faithful children and loving parents will make us worthy of this promise.

Be the Light of GOD’s Glory

The children of the 90’s grew up watching video cassettes and listening to tape recorders.  A decade later, the ‘snake’ game on a black and white Nokia became a definite craze. Alongside came regular doses of varied digital games. Today’s infant is born into a world of I-pads, androids, PS-4s, YouTube and on goes the list.

 

While it might amuse us to see our tech-savvy children learn the features of an ‘app’ so quickly, or beat our score on a high level video game, we wonder about the messages these little minds receive. When encouraging access to social media in our homes, we can only be safe if we adhere to the principles that we have been baptised into, the principles of Christianity.

Let us quickly peek into the digital capacity of our Christian lives before we glance back into our nearest gadget.

-          Being faithful on Facebook:  A Catholic shoulders the great responsibility of uplifting oneself, another and being faithful to the church. Something as little as a status update can go a long way in bringing the life of a reader in your social circle to a new beginning, to salvation, to Christ. What a promising platform for proclamation!

(Psalm 145:12 So that all people may know of your mighty acts and the glorious splendour of your kingdom.)

-          Tweet about the Gospel: ‘I will sing of the mercies of the Lord forever’ (Ps89). There are always days when we are overwhelmed and wonderstruck by God’s love for us. Let us not forget to tweet about it! Let the Gospel trend because of you! - #BecauseHeLives  #JesusIsLord #TheGoodNews  #HolyTrinityOneGod  #ChooseJesus  #GreatIsThyFaithfulness

-          Use Websites for Insights: ‘The more we hear the Word of God, the better will we know Him’. If I have access to a celeb-gossip website, I surely have access to an online bible. The condition of our lives is a result of the choices we make. Let’s make the right choices.

-          Insta-Everything : Just like I can upload a pic instantly, edit it even quicker and share it even faster, I can offer to pull up novena prayers and other litanies in my zonal prayer meetings to maximise devotional participation. I could perhaps initiate a zonal ‘WhatsApp’ group that instantly helps me share positive thoughts for the day with my community members, build unity and encourage pastoral initiative.

-          ‘I’ touch: No matter how much we socialise via digital media, it can never compensate for a real pat on the back, a friendly hand-shake, a meaningful conversation, a kiss on the cheek or a tight hug. Jesus personally touched and healed. So must we. Msns, emails, SMSs, Hike and G-talk - these might help us connect, but take away from us our core nature, of being human. #ThinkAboutIt

-          Proof-read: As much as in a hurry we are these days, let us pause to check if our outgoing message is – IMPORTANT, USEFUL and TRUE. Only after this 3 point check, should we let our words go out to meet their fate.

In conclusion, as an exercise of a faithful Christian exposed to the enveloping snares of mass media, let us pray the Our Father daily, with earnest stress on the words – ‘Lead us not into temptation’; that the Lord may guard our hearts and minds against all that is not from His Kingdom.

Let us also assess our closeness to our creator versus the world by thinking about – ‘What is the first thing that I do after waking up and the last before going to bed?’

Though a worldly urge may beep, may our inner voice always let the answer be, ‘The Word of My Lord’

Nothing beats Vanilla

The annual vacation made time for Grandpa and Macquin to be in each other's company. Mac was excited this year since he’d get to show off all the ‘cool’ gadgets, apps and novels he owned. New technology amazed him and he attempted daily to show Pa what he’d been missing. On their way to the ice-cream parlour one day, Mac pointed out, “Look Pa, the road is so rocky and long; we should’ve brought the car.” Grandpa smiled, “Son, imagine the relief when we get back to see that your father’s car has its tyres intact. These roads would’ve definitely torn them apart. Look at your legs, so strong. They can take you much further than any automobile.” Macquin seemed to give that some thought as he nodded.

Further ahead, they came upon a crippled man. Mac placed a coin in his outstretched palm. He had felt like placing two. However after some hesitance, he placed just one. He looked at Grandpa who had been observing him. “Pa, why do we have second thoughts?”

The reply came astutely, “Son, our noble first thought is from God. Then we allow our past experience & reasoning to mix with the ones that follow”.

Pensively Mac persisted, “But wouldn’t acting on our first thoughts make us impulsive? That could be dangerous.”

Grandpa replied, “True. So, we must continually feed our minds and hearts with good thoughts & words so that our immediate ‘impulsive’ tendency in any situation turns into a good deed. This way we can trust ourselves to always do what’s right”

Ruminating on those words, the boy wondered why he felt so stressed in the city and what was it about Grandpa that gained his respect. As they neared the parlour, he excitedly told his grandpa how terribly confused he was about which ice-cream to choose. Eventually he ordered a Choc Sundae. Grandpa chose good old Vanilla. Mac noticed that while his own tongue toggled sloppily over the tantalizing toppings, Grandpa seemed to relish his simple white serving. He exclaimed, “Pa, I chose the most delectable dollop and yet didn’t enjoy it half as much as you did.”

 Pa replied, “Son, you will find out eventually that the plain things in life are the most enjoyable. The sooner you realize this simple truth, the more you will benefit from your journey”

“For they are the ordinary things in life that matter most – a human touch, a smile, a meaningful glance, a simple phone call or message to let a loved one know you care. These are all the things that come to us naturally, they make us childlike. They make us more acceptable to Him who is seated high up in the clouds, the maker of heaven and earth.”

Thinking deeply on these words, Mac stared up at the serene sky. A cool breeze tickled his face making him smile. “More ice-cream?” asked Grandpa playfully. “Sure Pa”, said Mac excitedly. “I’ll take Vanilla this time. Nothing beats Vanilla!”

A Meal 3 Brothers Shared

Sometimes we go all over looking for inspiration. At other times, inspiration comes looking for us. It was time that I didn’t let it go unnoticed or disregarded again. So, I am telling you this story. A story of the day three brothers met.

Living can be defined in various ways. For some, life is just a series of breaths, for others it is the moments that take their breath away and for a few, it is every breath that counts. Horatio woke up from his dream with a start. It was the same one that had been haunting him for more than two years now; that of his mother taking him to the country-side. He didn’t remember why she dragged him there or for how long they stayed. All he knew was that he was a few years old, and at the time felt sad. He wished she had asked him before distancing him from his father. He resented that moment in his childhood not as much as he longed for closure till this day.

The loud beeping of the alarm sounded the start of a new dawn. There were the utensils that needed to be cleaned and plants to be watered. How he loved looking after his home. But first, he had to pray. The ‘Word of God’ as he called it, had to start his day. It was an alarm of a different kind - one that woke him up from within. He walked out of his bed, his thoughts lingering on from that dream. Incidentally it was his mother’s birthday the day before. He couldn’t gather himself to wish her, not after all these years of separation. All that he audibly accused her of, all that he secretly loved her for, seemed too complicated to examine now. It was easier to overlook these feelings and her birthday altogether.

He thanked the Lord for the renewed person he was becoming; the journey that he was on and the learning that made him understand life through the eyes of Christ. Not a single day went by without the thought of his brothers Luke and Fabien, his sister Fluorine who he wished he could remember more fondly and yes, his mother. Being separated from them was his decision and he was trapped like a fly in a spider’s web with it. The lying, the cheating, the betrayal and the toxic abuses had spun a dark web in his sub-conscience. He suffered with those thoughts; seeking release sometimes by spitting foul words and other times by reliving those memories behind the closed doors of his mind in the hope of understanding them better. She was getting old, his mother. Dying, probably. He didn’t know.  He didn’t have the courage to find out. It was too complex and yet so obvious. All that was needed was for him to take that step. If only the Lord could show him how.

Horatio sighed as he lifted his heavy heart and decided that this day was going to be good! As he watched the sun-rays piercing their way through the hallway, little did he realize that those beams meant to literally brighten up his day. After a morning walk with his beautiful wife of 32 years, he opened the newspaper, especially to check the latest update on the Railway budget. The phone rang. “It’s Luke”, said his wife Patricia in her typical style of subtle agitation. “Luke?” he whispered, his eyes anxious, his ears eager.

He took the receiver from her hand with a cacophony of voices in his head. He was so over-whelmed, he did not know what to think, what to do. ‘Is she dead?’ he thought. His mother - the woman who had given him birth; the vessel that once over-flowed with the pride of wealth as much as with concern for him; the woman who never failed to upset his wife; the monster who gave herself a medal on every fight that she caused within the family; that person 
whom he never understood, but cared for dearly only because his heart was made of gold. He listened to Luke intently and obliged. He agreed to go. He was no more startled by his decision than his wife was as she let him go.

The same sun that shone on Horatio was smiling on Luke that morning as he woke up to clean his mother’s sores. She had grown too weak to speak. He clandestinely hoped that she was grateful. He put a call through to Fabien, his voice hitting a higher volume than usual. He was enthusiastic that he had spoken to his elder brother just five minutes ago. Fabien listened keenly and smiled. He was on his way over from the bank to meet Luke and mother. They were hopeful to be united with Horatio. Fingers crossed, they waited.

Two hours had passed. The antsy brothers looked out of the window and peeped through the door randomly. There was no sign of him. They wondered if they had longed for this day in vain. A side-ward glimpse at his watch, Fabien unwrapped the parcel of food he had carried with him.
It was almost lunch time. Luke looked heavenward as he always did. His mother’s eyes moved from the door not for a moment. She had waited too long for this day. Just then, they heard a loud clearing of throat coming from the direction of the staircase. Unmistakably it was him, the light at the end of the tunnel.

Horatio had arrived. He was gladdened by the respectful reception he got from his brothers. They wished and hugged. He looked around, his eyes finally settling on a tiny body; a wrecked life boat that once was capable of surviving many a storm. His world came to a stand-still. His eyes brimmed with tears as hers brimmed with melancholy. She looked wonderingly at him, her eyes being her sole communicator. He knelt down beside her and placed a scapular round her neck. The brothers took some pictures of that sweet reunion. 
Horatio joined his brothers who sat on the couch nearby. They had much to catch up on. They talked about dear ones they had lost in the past two years, shared stories of their families, and lost no time in giving each other latest updates on trivia. Not once did any of them speak of Fluorine. It was as if the poison of her virtual presence would corrupt the beauty of that day.

All that talk built up their hunger. Luke had prepared a simple meal; it turned out to be a rather special one. Fabien’s side-dish was warmly welcomed. As they sat to thank the Lord, in their hearts, they gave thanks for much more than food. For in that meal that was shared by three brothers, God had fulfilled a dream, a dream that was shared by three brothers."